Maybe I'll Just Be An Aunt

 Hadley and I just got back the movies. Yep. We went to the THEATER! It felt like we had never been before. Did you know they have a HUGE SCREEN? And SURROUND SOUND? It's AMAZING! And, yes, there were barely any people allowed to actually sit in the theater, and everyone wore masks (I hope) during the movie. Hadley is such a rule-follower, she pulled her mask up and down as she sipped and ate. Every bit. Up. Down. Up. Down.

So, on the way home, Hadley says, "You know how I tell you I might just want to be a cool aunt and not have any kids?" (She says this often. She either wants three kids--she LOVES kids--or to just be a "cool aunt.) 

"Well," she said, "I just think Christmas is so fun, and I want to have fun with my own kids, but it's just hard when you want to be gay (her words), and other people aren't gay, so I'm probably not going to meet anyone (insert crying mom emoji)...but I could still adopt and have a kid."

Can you imagine if your ten-year-old straight kid (or so you think) said, "I'm probably not going to meet anyone, so I will just be single or adopt?" Wouldn't you think that's ridiculous? (I thought this in my 20's, but at 10, I was thinking all the boys at school and all the celebs on TV were total possibilities for my life partner.)

I said, "I know you feel like that now. You feel like you are the only gay kid. There are others that either don't know yet or that are afraid to say it. When you get to middle school, you will see that there are more than just you." I went on to tell her that kids at my middle school (in my small town) even "date" (middle school kids don't really date) of the same sex and no one cares. (I lied a little. The KIDS don't care and don't make a big deal about it, besides the regular middle school drama. Many adults totally think it's a big deal and weird, but I didn't mention that part, because that is what she already knows as reality.)

I then said, "One day you are going to meet someone that you don't want to live without. You will date some people, maybe some losers like the rest of us, but eventually you will meet someone that you want to wake up with every day, and that person will feel the same way about you."

The thought of this CHILD thinking she has to settle for "being an aunt" makes me so sad. Gut wrenchingly sad. Being "a cool aunt" is fine. Deciding to be one at 10, because you think the world around you is not okay with you marrying who you want, is not. 

Whoever gets to have this girl as a girlfriend one day is so lucky. Whoever gets to have her as a life partner is even luckier. I can't wait to meet you.